The last six months of my life have been nothing if not chaotic. I ended a 13 ½ year relationship, began living alone for the first time in the same amount of time, realized some harsh truths about myself and my own shortcomings regarding relationships and codependency, and spent a lot of time sitting in a room alone with 2 clingy, old, Chihuahuas, watching the ceiling fan spin around. In a friend’s empty, huge, house. Thinking.
I’ve caught up with my family once again, to a point. They’ve been shockingly NOT nosey and intrusive, and thankfully haven’t asked too many questions. My family has never been good at maintaining healthy boundaries, and has never been shy about flat out asking questions that are none of their business. Until the last six months. I haven’t been bombarded with requests for the sensational details of my mid-life modifications and the resulting aftermath. My infidelity, my moral turpitude, my irreverent ways, and the many other extraordinary aspects of my present, haven’t been inquired upon. And it’s made think a lot easier on me, truthfully. It is one of life’s simple, yet profound, truths. No matter how distant you’ve been, how different you are, how much time has passed since you’ve spoken, your family always seems to know when to leave you the hell alone, and when to insert their opinion. Or, at least mine does. And if you know us at all, that seems quite unbelievable. We ain’t the Waltons.
My friends have been the big shocker. In fact, I have better friends than I thought I did. Great friends in people I thought only spoke to me for the purposes of entertainment. Or because we’d known each other for 40 years. I’ve had a roof over my head because of one of them. I took online classes because of another. I was able to keep my step-daughter and grandson off the street because of yet another one. There have been too many to count as far as being an ear to vent to, or just an ear to bullshit with. Many occasions of them flying in like a seagull to put some people in their place on social media for trying to attack my opinions, even when they didn’t agree with my opinions.
I’ve made a lot of mistakes. I’ve made bad choices and decisions. I’ve caused harm to people I was supposed to care about. I’ve associated with derelicts and worse. Somehow, along the way, I managed to make, and keep, some very amazing, selfless, awesome, people in my life. People that set the bar really freaking high, as far as what a friend should be. It is one of the few things that I’ve done right.